In India, divorces are a big deal. And they are! Breaking off from a relationship is like opting for an amputation. It is painful but sometimes that is necessary for your survival. From the financial toll to the mental agony to the social judgments, the decision to divorce is not easy. Despite that divorce rates are increasing in India and in this blog, I would be taking you down the lane of reasons.
According to reports, divorcees have doubled over the past two decades with most cases of divorces happening in the urban areas of India. Whether it is the interference of family, the growing independence of women, awareness of human rights, or education, there are many factors that are contributing to this rise. Impulse wedding, adultery, dowry, and infertility also contributes to this number!
Here are 9 reasons that answer why divorces are increasing in India.
9 Reasons why divorce rates are Increasing in India
1. A Traumatic truth
One of the prime grounds for seeking divorce is abuse and trauma in the relationship. Abuse, whether, physical, mental, or emotional by men is an age-old issue, but it is the rising awareness of rights, a better understanding of the law, and growing independence of modern women, that is now taking these cases to the court.
Domestic violence is a very common issue in India with women reporting eye injuries, sprains, dislocations, burns, broken bones, and broken teeth. According to reports, 31 percent of married women have experienced abuse by their spouses. While physical violence is the most common type, emotional violence is also a major concern.
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2. Changing status of women
In the last few decades, the status of Indian women has undergone a tectonic transformation. Women, today, are fiercely independent, in terms of their finance, social status, and mental strength. They are no more dependent on the men in their life to provide them with food, clothing, and shelter. In fact, today many women are earning more than their male counterparts.
This change in the status of women in a patriarchal society is resulting in ego clashes and an overburden of family responsibilities on the women. Women walk out of marriages where they have to deal with abusive and destructive men.
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3. Equations with the in-laws
In India, we live in a close-knit family that has its own set of rules, traditions, and customs. More than 50 percent of Indian couples live with their parents and that comes with its own set of challenges. From over-interference to adjusting to a restrictive setting, many things can lead to clashes between the couple.
While it is true that family gives us strength and support, sometimes, the family could be the root cause of divorce. Degrading relations with in-laws and disrespect for the elders often end up in divorce.
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4. Don’t be the boss in bed
There is no boss in the bedroom. Couples who follow this mantra live a blissful and happy married life. But in most Indian marriage settings, men are treated as superior to their wives. This primitive thinking is making marriages crumble.
As I have mentioned earlier, modern women are independent and self-sufficient. They must have a choice and voice in the relationship. The same goes for men, if the wife is a manipulative and control freak then it might end up in a rather nasty divorce.
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5. Adultery and infidelity
If there is no trust in a relationship, then there is no meaning in sticking together. Extra-marital affairs are quite common and it can be either the man or the woman. Earlier couples stayed in the relationship even after knowing about their partner’s adultery because of social and familial pressure.
But today, they are finally acknowledging that it is better to live a single and happy life than stay in a toxic, non-existent marriage that’s smudged with adultery, infidelity, and lies.
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6. The broken bridge of communication
Many modern marriages fail simply because partners aren’t communicating well. While the stressful daily routine and straining work-life balance can take a toll, most of the time, communication fizzles out because of arguments and disagreements.
Possessiveness, mistrust, suspicion, frequent arguments, and disrespect can break that bridge where each person can bear their heart without a filter. Arguments in a marriage are not a bad thing, and neither are quarrels, but it is how you communicate your issues that make a great difference.
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7. Sexual Problems
The final nail in the coffin is the sexual issues in a marriage. Sex is a very important part of our lives and sexual dissatisfaction can be frustrating. Having a strong sexual relationship nurtures the emotional and physical connection between the couple.
But with the rising stress and worries of modern life, sexual problems are also on a constant rise. Impotency, loss of libido, erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and several such sexual issues can create trouble in paradise. While most couples don’t discuss it openly, it can still lead to divorce.
8. An outdated frame of mind
Even today some men want their wives to be virgins and they don’t flinch before conducting a virginity test on the wife. There have been cases, where the man divorced his wife over a virginity test. Also, divorce is common if an Indian woman has issues conceiving a child.
A recent study also revealed that sexual orientation is also impacting Indian marriages. In an evolving number of cases, the men or the women might discover their homosexuality or bisexuality after marriage and this results in a divorce, especially in arranged marriages.
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9. Impulse wedding and different paths
Though the instances are low, there are cases where couples got married on an impulse after dating for a few months, without actually getting to know each other. This may also be triggered by familial pressure or peer pressure but marriages that happened for any reason other than love can crumble down.
Also, as the couples discover their entirely different set of interests and hobbies they might decide to choose their unique paths and opt for mutually consented divorce.
Divorces aren’t a bad thing. It isn’t the end of the world. But it is also true that divorces are mentally and emotionally draining, not just for you but also for your family. And if children are involved, divorces can be more difficult. So, it is better to take your time, make up your mind and take the plunge only when you are sure!
Create your own marriage template and make sure that you ask the right questions and make your own observations. If the family is creating trouble, then communicate with your partner, and find a middle ground where you both can exist peacefully.
What are the main reasons behind the increasing divorce rates in India?
Divorce rates in India are on the rise due to various factors such as changing societal norms, increased financial independence of women, and a shift in traditional family dynamics.
How have changing societal norms impacted divorce rates in India?
With urbanization and globalization, societal norms have evolved, leading to more liberal attitudes toward divorce and empowering individuals to seek a way out of unhappy or abusive marriages.
Is the financial independence of women a significant factor contributing to rising divorce rates?
Yes, the growing financial independence of women has played a crucial role in the increasing divorce rates, as women now have the means and confidence to leave unhappy marriages and seek a better life.
What role does communication play in marital relationships?
Effective communication is vital for maintaining a healthy marriage. Lack of communication or poor communication skills can lead to misunderstandings, resentment, and ultimately, divorce.
Are arranged marriages more prone to divorce in India?
There is no concrete evidence to suggest that arranged marriages are more prone to divorce. Successful marriages, whether arranged or love-based, depend on the commitment and compatibility of the partners involved.
How does societal pressure influence the decision to divorce in India?
Societal pressure to stay in an unhappy marriage, fear of judgment, and concerns about reputation can often deter individuals from seeking a divorce, even when it may be the best choice for their well-being.
Are financial issues a common cause of marital conflicts leading to divorce?
Yes, financial problems can be a significant cause of marital conflicts, as disagreements over money management and financial stress can strain the relationship.
What role does infidelity play in divorce cases?
Infidelity can be a major contributing factor to divorce cases, as it often leads to a breakdown of trust and emotional connection between spouses.
How do cultural and generational differences impact marital relationships?
Cultural and generational gaps can sometimes lead to misunderstandings and conflicts between spouses, affecting the overall stability of the marriage.
Can seeking professional counseling help save a marriage on the verge of divorce?
Yes, professional counseling can be highly beneficial in helping couples address their issues, improve communication, and find ways to rebuild their relationship, potentially avoiding divorce.